How to Train a Kitten

Written by: Leni Sosa; Permanence of Wings

 

You don’t need it.

But I want it.

Are you sure?

Yes.

Because it’s sharp.

Yes.

That means you’ll depend on it.

But that’s what it’s for, isn’t it?

No… it’s a tool. You’re the weapon. You start out with this when you’ve got so much to learn … and what do you think will happen?

I don’t know.

You never become the weapon.

Oh.

You want to be the weapon, don’t you? Or do you want to own a tool? See, you have to make up your mind. I will give you the tool … if that’s what you want … but to take the tool before you’re the weapon … well, you’ll never be the weapon.

Oh.

You’ll be like that cat that sits on a comfortable porch … the one that spreads himself out all day by the water and food bowl.

But that cat isn’t fighting with a tool … it’s just lazy.

Well, maybe it isn’t the best example, but what I mean is… if you pick the tool, you’ll become lazy. You aren’t depending on yourself. The tool owns you much like the cat’s master. The cat depends on the master … you would depend on an object … and although it’s just a tool, it would own a very important part of you. … What if the tool gets taken away! What if that lazy, unprepared cat loses everything and has to fend for himself in a feral world? Uh? Yah, you don’t want to be a domesticated cat… you want to be a wild cat.

Yah, I want to be a wild cat! Maybe a tiger … you know they’re tougher than lions? … but, no… a liger. I want to be a …

So, no tool, right?

No tool.

What are you?

A boy…

Yes, but what are you going to be?

A liger?

A weapon. You’ll be a weapon.

I’ll be a weapon.

Good. Now let’s get started, kitten. Make you into a liger or something.